What does it take to bring two long-established boys’ and girls’ houses together and create one thriving co-educational community? If it takes a village to raise a child, it certainly takes a city to raise a boarding house. When the opportunity arose to merge two houses with histories stretching back to the 1880s, I relished the chance to start afresh. This was a rare opportunity to create a space where every pupil, regardless of gender, truly belongs. As Owen Eastwood puts it, our aim was to build a Whakapapa -a shared story of our boarding community in which every pupil knows, “You belong here, whatever your story.”
Co-educational boarding is more than a structural change; it is an opportunity to foster inclusivity, mirror real-world social dynamics, and provide pupils with the social and emotional tools they need for life beyond school. While there were understandable initial concerns about risk when boys and girls would live under one roof, we knew that the benefits far outweighed the challenges. Our objective was clear: to create a house that balanced social development, academic enrichment, and a sense of real-world preparation.
We asked ourselves what boarding should provide, what we would want for our own children, and how our pupils should feel when they returned home each day.
Redefining culture began with reflection and dialogue. We asked ourselves what boarding should provide, what we would want for our own children, and how our pupils should feel when they returned home each day. From these discussions emerged three guiding pillars for School House: be kind, be calm, and be respectful. These values underpin every interaction, and we reinforced them through staff training, induction, and daily routines. As Andy Buck has said, “Vision and values must be known by everyone, seen everywhere, and lived daily.” By embedding consistent language and expectations, we could ensure that staff interactions with pupils were fair, empathetic, and grounded in shared principles.
Building a cohesive house culture required creativity and intentionality. Boarding houses are rich in tradition, and merging two histories could easily have created tension or a sense of territoriality. We focused on rituals, symbols, and shared experiences that would unite rather than divide. House Prefects were reinstated to provide leadership and support, while ceremonies such as leaving fingerprints on the School House Tree helped pupils feel ownership of their shared history. The return of the house colour, purple, and small touches such as room signs displaying pupils’ national flags and birthday acknowledgements, reinforced a sense of pride and belonging. By using inclusive language and embedding our values into every interaction, pupils learned quickly that the house was a place for everyone.
Creating a co-educational house also required careful operational planning to ensure safety, privacy, and smooth routines. Flexible doors allowed us to create separate zones for boys and girls, while communal spaces such as the kitchens, pool room, and games areas encouraged interaction. Staff follow a three-phase knock protocol to protect pupil privacy, and clear routines ensure boundaries are respected. Extensive risk assessments and safeguarding measures are essential, but they are approached with transparency and a mindset of “it could happen here,” which fosters a positive reporting culture for both staff and pupils.
Alongside infrastructure and routines, relationships remained central to our ethos. Boarding is the heart of a school, where staff can have profound impact on pupils’ lives through daily interactions, vertical mentoring, and shared experiences. Our commitment to care, inclusivity, and mutual respect shapes everything we do, from enrichment programmes to informal social time. Activities range from creative workshops and photo scavenger hunts to visits to musicals and local historical sites, ensuring there is something for everyone. Simple acknowledgements, whether a wave in the corridor or recognition in a house meeting, help pupils feel seen and valued.
The results so far have been incredibly encouraging. Pupils describe School House as a home, where the sense of family is palpable.
The results so far have been incredibly encouraging. Pupils describe School House as a home, where the sense of family is palpable. One international boarder reflected, “It is so much better than single sex; there is always something happening.” Peer leadership has created channels for pupil voice, daily interactions foster confidence in approaching staff, and the house has seen increased boarding placements as day pupils opt to join the community for flexi or full boarding. Friendships have flourished through natural social interactions in shared spaces, while structured routines and enrichment activities build confidence, teamwork, and resilience. For anyone considering co-education in boarding, the key is to embrace the challenge fully.
Embedding values visibly, investing in routines and spaces, and prioritising relationships all contribute to a thriving community. A co-educational house prepares pupils for the realities of living and working alongside different genders and backgrounds, and the word that resonates most strongly with our boarders is family -a true sense of belonging that surpasses the labels of boys’ or girls’ houses.
Of course, the success of a house depends on more than just vision; it requires the collective effort of staff across every department. From matrons and tutors to maintenance, catering, admissions, and marketing, everyone contributes to the wellbeing, safety, and culture of the house. At School House, this collaboration has allowed us to create a vibrant, inclusive, and joyful community where pupils feel known, valued, and supported.
Ultimately, a co-educational boarding house demonstrates that with intentional planning, clear values, and a focus on relationships, boys and girls can thrive together, forming a community that prepares them for life beyond school. It is a privilege to lead such a house, and our experience offers encouragement to other schools seeking to embrace the potential of co-education in boarding. I would be happy to discuss our experiences and insights with anyone considering co-educational boarding. Sharing lessons and supporting colleagues is one of the most rewarding parts of this journey.
Callum Carroll, MTIOB
Teacher of Classics; Housemaster of School House; Housemaster of Whiston; Pupil Council Coordinator
King’s School, Rochester
